"I will destroy you" Picks Up Win Against "Pound the Mansel" to Capture Eighth Place (that’s last place for our readers)
Lets here from the NFL broadcast team of Michaels and Collingsworth...
Al Michaels: You know Chris, the viewers might think the celebration we see going on behind us is for Mansel...NOT AT ALL.
Chris Collingsworth: So true Al. It’s really for Coach who stepped up and let Mansel win a game. Coach could have easily won this game but he gave Mansel a chance to put one in the “W” column.
Al Michaels: Let’s take a look at the breakdown of week 4 in the Lunch Gang Fantasy Football League.
“I will destroy you” took down “Pound the Mansel” 122.80 - 102.45 (Coach you did a great job in letting Mansel win - Jim Schwartz). With this win, “I will destroy you” scored 38.7% more than projected; can now stop crying in stall 3 during lunch and come back to the lunch table. Leading “Pound the Mansel”, Jamaal Charles (23.50 points) and Eli Manning (23.45) both ranked highly overall for the week (Nice substitution Coach - Andy Reid, head coach Philadelphia Eagles). “I will destroy you” (1-3, 386.45 points) climbs into eighth place while “Pound the Mansel” (2-2, 404.10 points) drops to third place.
“I will destroy you” Smooth Moves (not really-it was fixed)
- Tom Brady had 35.40 points (Gisele Bundchen must have let him back into her bed after last years super bowl mishap-he shoots, he scores...wait wrong sport), the fourth-highest QB score of the week...Blah, Blah, Blah.
- The Chicago Bears Defense had 18.00 points - the rumor mill has it that Jerry Jones told his team to take a dive. Lovey Smith feels overwhelmed whenever he goes to Jerry’s house...so Jerry let him win.
- The 12.90 points by Wes Welker topped a projected 10.31 - that’s because Brady’s old lady threaten to beat his ass and told him if he ever drops another one of Tom’s passes she’d cut off his balls.
“Pound the Mansel” Regret Tracker
- Left Marques Colston on the bench, where he scored 26.30 points. Actually this was not a regret. Mansel agreed to a side-bar agreement with Coach. The agreement was if Coach let Mansel win (not playing Colston) he would buy his lunch on Fridays for the remainder of the year. Coach agreed, besides, would you want to hear a grown man cry like a baby in stall 3 every day.
- Jermichael Finley has scored below his projection in three straight games - you can NEVER trust a GB dog. NEVER. - TRADE IN THE WORKS
- It’s that Madden Curse I tell you! - Calvin Johnson scored a season-low 5.40 points, 37.9% of his projected 14.25, which is his lowest percentage of the year.
What If
- I will destroy you would be 0-4 if, Pound the Mansel had played Colston...Cry Baby Mansel! There’s no crying in football and No Pixie Dust.
Game Notes
- After scoring 102.45 points against a projected 88.05, Pound the Mansel has been just amazing in his player selections for three straight weeks - Thanks Mansel for lunch...Coach!
- Although Pound the Mansel lost, they did put up the second-highest score for a losing team in the league this season.
- I will destroy you won by 20.35 points, covering the 0.51-point spread.
- The win by I will destroy you snapped a three-game losing streak. The Lunch Gang just couldn’t listen to him cry anymore. He even stopped coming to the lunch table he was so embarrassed.
